I just spent four days in the presence of a beautiful group of peers in Colorado at the annual Summit for the Touched by a Horse® (TBAH®), Equine Gestalt Coaching® program. I went in hopes of becoming more educated and learning new techniques on how to promote and develop my coaching program here at One Neigh at a Time, Inc. Sometimes, don’t we all need a good kick in the pants? Well, I got that and a lot more. Now I’m ready to get out of my chair and talk — face-to-face — with you and anyone willing to take a few minutes to hear my story and about how the horses and I can guide you to a joyful life in recovery.

I have used the fact that I am an introvert long enough. Fear, I’ve found, is my enemy. I fear rejection and I fear success. So, the easiest thing to do is sit in my chair, post on my Facebook page, write my blogs, and creatively come up with new ideas. That’s all fun for me, safe and easy, but calling a stranger is scary. Cold calling gives me the chills.

What I found out at the TBAH Summit is that I have to get out of my chair. The horses are magnificent, this coaching program is incredible, and I am certified and competent. Now I need more confidence. Becoming confident in myself is something I am continually working on. As a recovering alcoholic, I am always working on the whats and hows I need to improve myself. Before recovery I used alcohol to cover my fear and to give me courage to step out of my comfort zone. I no longer have that substance to make me feel strong and brave. Now I know that the courage has to come from within.

My favorite quote is from Marianne Williamson. “Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us.  There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you.”

As an introvert, I grew up shy and quiet. I was always more comfortable one-on-one than with a group of friends. I was taught that I had to be outgoing and talkative to be “normal.” Drinking gave me the courage to do that to feel normal. I know now that being quiet and shy is also normal. It’s who I am. I feel awkward or nervous about being in a group setting. That means that talking to a group about how my business could be beneficial to those in recovery is frightening. The more I step into my confidence, the more confident and competent I will be.  Kathy, just do it! Start today!

I also fear becoming too busy. My business is centered around staying in each moment of every day, living one “neigh” at a time. When I live in fear of what could, would, or should become of my life, I am getting way ahead of myself. My lesson this past week was ‘remember to stay in the day.’ To believe in myself, believe in all I learned in the TBAH program, trust the horse, and trust the process. The horses are here to heal, to whisper to our inner self, and give us courage to be present. So I am doing them a disservice when I stay in my chair and hide. Beginning now I will begin with the following mantra every day: “I am both competent and confident, as a coach and as a human.” I commit to making myself a priority and I hope you will, too.

I will see you in the barn. The horses are waiting.