I am struggling today with depression, it’s cold, windy and I’m tired of winter.  The sun is peeking out and then goes into hiding again, as does my mood.   I need to Gestalt myself out of this mood; touch into my body, recognizing the signs of sadness.  As I’m noticing my mood swings, I can catch my mind drifting into negative thoughts and finding fault in myself and others.  It’s time I fill my mind with positive vibrations.

I accept and recognize that I need to take care of myself, find my way out of the darkness that is settling into my body.  I need to dig into my toolbox of ideas that my clients and I work with and use them today on myself.  Writing is one of my go too’s.  I can walk outside, even when it’s cold.  I like to listen to empowering podcast, love me some Oprah; find my light inside. Work on brightening up my insides, so my outsides shine.

I need to gestalt my mood. If I had a client in the round pen with one of my horses, I might ask her to repeat what she said, “I’m struggling with my depression today, and I don’t know why?” I could even ask her to continue saying it, feel into the words, repeat until she and the horse connect with her emotion, then we would go on from there.

Depression can hit hard. To change your focus, we need to redirect our thoughts;  to change the direction of mind chatter.  What can I control?  Not the weather, not other people, only myself. I can become aware of the noise, meditating in silence, and for me, a prayer to guide me in the direction of kindness and love, pepper in a little joy too.

I need to find my way back to wholeness. Breathe in the crispness of the cold air; I’m starting my grateful list, feel the sun on my face.  The sun makes the snow sparkle, and that makes me smile.  The river looks beautiful with the caps of snow lining the shoreline.   I have my health, and I can go outside and walk, and feed the animals and shovel manure.  Ride a horse or work with a client in the round pen.  I am healthy.  My mood is changing as I’m writing this, adding positive aspects of my life into my mind, wiping away the negative.  

Moods can fluctuate according to the weather, the time of day and even the energy around conversations.  I need a good laugh, think I’ll go out and take pictures of the horses, or the snow glistening along the side of the river to brighten my light.  

When you are feeling blue, reach into your toolbox and find a way to start pulling yourself out of the darkness.  I know it’s not easy and I still might slide into my dark place as the day goes on, but don’t give in and slide deeper into your depression; it’s hard to get out the deeper you fall.  If you too are struggling today, take a few of my tools and work on finding your light.