“No one knows better than I do all the hell that I have been through. I will no longer beat up on myself, when I know so well the blows I have endured. Starting today, I will be a better friend to myself.” — Marianne Williamson
It’s so easy for me to beat myself up, to find my faults and run with them. I find myself concentrating on my mistakes. Allowing negative thoughts and actions free rent in my head. Clearing away the disaster I created from my past was necessary in recovery. I needed room for positive thoughts.
I had to clean house in my mind, get rid of the old, grimy, dingy thoughts and mistakes. Make room for the new clean, shiny bright feelings of inspiration and joy. I took each and ever piece out individually and looked at it, turning it inside out and seeing if it still fit or no longer had a place in my head. I kept some of my items hanging there, not quite ready to dispose of them. Inevitably, I would toss it out later. Learning that if it wasn’t a perfect fit today it wouldn’t be a good fit later. Recognizing what served me and what did not was an important process. I had to feel comfortable with my choices, or else I would pick it up later and be forced to go through the process all over again.
Clearing my mind, made it possible to go searching for some new fun ideas. Learning how to listen to my heart, inspire my mind and feed my body, takes time and practice.
Becoming healthy is hard work, its worth the pain and difficulty. My horses helped guide me through these transitional moments.
Horses are incredible listeners, they are not judgmental or opinionated. Horses stay completely in the moment. Listening to your heart, not your words. Giving you strength and courage to balance your heart, mind and soul. We have plenty of pitchforks in the barn for your mistakes and big hearts to help guide you on your journey to letting go, releasing your past and embracing your future.
My favorite phrase was~I want it and I want it now~this did not work so well for me, as my ego tricked me into making unhealthy choices. I have learned to take time to stop and listen to my heart. I’ve had many conversations with my horses, dropping my troubles at their hoofs and walking away with a clearer understanding of the pathways I need to take to discovering my true authentic self.
I heard my horses nickers and neighs this morning, could they be calling for you to drop your trouble at their hoofs?
“By bringing the past into the present, we create a future just like the past. By letting the past go, we make room for miracles.” — Marianne Williamson